Monday, January 12, 2009

Atchoo! [It's Really A Word]

So I'm pretty sure a woman just saw me sneeze while driving. Come to think of it, I don't think I've EVER seen someone sneeze while driving passed me. It's weird enough to see someone sneeze or to even partake in the act of sneezing, but while driving? This might not sound odd to anyone else, but it is to me. It just is. And you hardly ever see people sneezing in movies. Not even in the background of a city. ...well, unless it is one of those scenes where it's supposed to be the object of the scene's humor.

Why is it that I don't blog in three weeks and I find it necessary to talk about sneezing? I think it was just something I wanted to say to get me started again. Where's my groove? How do I get back into my flow? I don't like the blogs where I say "Work" and "Home" and just update on things, because that's no fun. Blogs are places to vent or just ramble about a thought or idea; sneezing can make for fairly decent blog-writing material, I suppose. Let's see...

Well, when I was driving--you know, that one time I sneezed and a woman saw me?--it felt like one of those movie scenes from a "The Night The Meteor Hit" or whatnot where all mankind just up and disappears and the only person left is, well, me. From the moment I turned onto the road connecting to the lane I live on [I live on a lane?? That sounds odd saying it out loud...], I had no vehicles in front or behind me the entire time until I pulled into my driveway. I even watched in my rearview mirror to see if any cars passed by the lane entrance [again, odd] with no luck.

Well, I guess with luck, because everyone driving is an idiot. With the snowy weather lasting for weeks, people became even bigger idiots driving than I thought was possible. Then came the stereotypical Washington rain, making drivers freak out beyond all belief because, "Oh no! The snow is melting! What is this liquefied snow that looks eerily familiar but I haven't seen the likes of in three weeks?? What should I DO?!?!?!" And then it gets back to normal with the overcast and drizzle, leading to rear-ending accidents in front of the coffee stand, bringing policemen, an ambulance with multiple EMTs, and a pumper truck filled with firemen looking for some kind of action, all disappointed because someone didn't stop when they should have and accidentally kissed bumpers with the car in front of them. Dear lord, is it necessary to call in the cavalry? I guess when the big action in town [according to a regular customer who happens to be a county sheriff] is tracking down a specific car with expired tabs, a fender bender is enough to call in the cavalry.

Whatever, I suppose. I'm fine with driving the speed limit, always second-guessing and waiting until I am 100% sure with any move I make, and...

...oh my dear Lord, there is a spider on the ceiling. Granted, it's teeny tiny, but it's one of those ones that is so light brown that it almost seems transparent. It's a spider, none-the-less, and I don't want it ANYWHERE NEAR ME! ...Now I feel something on my foot. It's like in elementary school when the office personnel reports that there is a lice outbreak in the school and you start feeling tickles in your hair. I can also hear the light bulbs buzzing in here. I think I'm paranoid.

Moses just burped. I'm surrounded by transparent spiders, buzzing light bulbs, and burping dogs. This is why I am blogging.

Actually, I'm blogging because I just got home from work and Andrew is going to be late getting home, which means that it'll be me and the dogs for a few hours and there's not much for me to do besides blog, watch movies or TV shows that I have already seen, eat [and you shouldn't do that unless you are truly hungry, which I am not. I had a burrito at work. It was delicious], work out on my elliptical [which I've already done today and have done for the past five days or so], or read. I plan on reading after this because I am in the middle of a really good book ["A Mercy" by Toni Morrison. A gift from Andrew, the love of my life, who remembered that I wanted it after only once hinting when we passed it in a store] but when I read, I get comfortable, and when I get comfortable, I get sleepy. And you know what happens when you get sleepy.

You dream of spiders dangling from the ceiling and you wake up at the end of the bed freaking out because you think it is real. It happens to everyone... right?

...right?

This book I'm in the middle of is a hard read. No, I'm not mentally challenged and no, I don't have the reading capabilities of a Kindergartner; it is simply a hard read. The first chapter really got me all twisted up. The book, so far, is about slavery and love [but not loving slavery]. Each chapter is told from a different character's point of view, and each character's word choice and even punctuation usage is different, making it obvious when a change of character occurs, but makes it difficult to read when the lesser educated characters are doing the talking. I sometimes have to read sentences out loud to figure out how exactly the character means it to sound. It is a good book so far: lots of detail, emotion, analogies / similes, and outlooks on life, love, and religion. I'm kind of looking forward to ending this blog so that I can pick up the book. Maybe I'll get really uncomfortable so that I'll be awake enough to read more than I normally would.

That spider has not moved. I actually forgot it was there until I stretched and saw it again. Yuk.

It's weird not having Sam living here anymore. She moved back home due to lack of money for rent [understandable], in addition to her forward-moving relationship that is headed toward moving away to California. It was fun while she was here; there was always something funny going on! But now that she's gone, we moved lots of big items [a desk, a drum set, the printer and a small table, Christmas wrapping stuff, etc.] into the empty room, freeing up some much needed space in the bedrooms and living room. Although taking down our Christmas tree would also help with that, we have yet to accomplish this task. Yes, it is January 12th and we still have our Christmas tree up. I think it's like having a plant in the corner of the room. Yea, that's what it'll be until we take it down: "the plant in the corner of the room." We just need to remember to water it [have we done this more than once? I don't think so...].

It's almost midnight and I say this is an okay length for a blog, considering I'm trying not to make it a boring "update." The dogs are rough housing as usual, I am still alone, and my book is staring at me longingly. Now the real question is: where are my chips that I don't need to eat while reading before bed at midnight??